Fawkes News

I lack originality, but there is no reason to throw away $5.

So … Let’s review. I theoretically was planning to:

• Do research for my 21H.102 paper: partial check. I watched the documentary and read about half the book I was hoping to read
• Read that book on rails: no.
• Sleep: meh? I did … but probably not enough and my sleep schedule is kinda fucked now
• Watch 30 Rock: totally did that. I am now up to Season 4, Episode 9, meaning I’m only a couple hours behind what’s been broadcast. This is more sad than an accomplishment.

Some other things I did include:

• As I mentioned last week, did some packaging of meals for Haiti disaster relief.
• As I also mentioned last week, watched too much (i.e. any) C-SPAN during the healthcare debate
• Put an old personal project up on Github for the hell of it. It’s amusing to see how I programmed as a 16 year old. … I’ve written better software, I swear.
• Read the first 4 chapters of Real World Hakell
• Got some more internship applications out … with no results
• Almost went on a date but then it got cancelled
• Did a lot of thinking about who I am, what I want out of life, etc. … without reaching many conclusions.
• May or may not managed to have picked up some sickness somewhere… not feeling so great.

Overall, not so productive a break. I’m not particularly happy that it’s over. Oh well, can’t do anything but move forward.

:-/.

~Donald

I am tired and it is Spring Break, so I don’t feel like writing anything in depth and feel reasonable in being lame. So … here’s a list of some things I plan to work on this week with my free time if/when I become less lazy:

• Read a book, watch a documentary, do other research about communes from 1960 to the present for my 21H.102 paper.
• Read some more of Agile Web Development with Rails because my lack of Rails knowledge makes me feel like a bad rubyist sometimes.
• Catch up on the Debathena trainee meetings that I’ve missed thanks to conflicts
• Sleep. Other times of resting.
• Catch up on 6.002 LOL. JK. Dropped it.
• Watch more 30 Rock.

By comparison, what I did today was none of these things. I instead:

• Watched hours of C-SPAN coverage of the House healthcare debate.
• Helped make a couple hundred of the 28,110 Haiti-bound meals at a Stop Hunger Now event at my parents church
• Ate a cheeseburger.

Yea Spring Break!

~Donald

This week was kinda hellish. I actually started this as part of my freewriting last weekend. (It borrows some of its imagery from the prose thereof). I finished it this morning while avoiding sleeping and to submit to Rune by the deadline of today (the 12th). I can’t decide if the poem is actually any good.

MIT

There’s a fire hose:
You drink it.

Well, you try to drink it.

You playfully examine it
For a few moments, then
You wrap your lips around the nozzle,
And pump up the pressure:

It blows you back
And pins you to a wall.

The spray stings your eyes,
But if it brings tears to them,
They are washed away by the flow,
Before you, or anyone else,
Can be sure they were there.

Your limbs ache,
You think that if only
You could rest them,
You could hold them stronger
But the time for rest rarely comes.

Some people, washed in despair
Or simply sanity, step out of the way
Never to look back and never to regret.

Some collapse or simply drown.

Others stand the force.
The mass of the waters accelerates,
But still they stand strong.
Wavering at times,
But never giving up.

And one day the flow slows
To a stream, to a trickle, to a drip
Then it stops.

You stand there:
Sudden and Sullen,
Dripping and Deflated,
Percolated, but Proud,
Wet, but Wise.

And you reach out,
Brass Rat rusted to your knuckle:
You grab a beaker and into it
You wring the waters of knowledge
From the clothes of your experience.

You take this drought and distill it.
You bottle it, you market it, or you give it away,
But, with luck, it takes the world by storm.

From the fire hose flow rises the rarefied results
Filtered through your hands,
Tested in your trials, Fortified in your failures,
Vivified in your victories.

You look back with mixed emotions:
Wondering if it was all really worth it.
Your prospective my grow,
It may never be clear,
But the fire hose flows on…

~D.B. Guy (March 6-12, 2010)

This weekend I was on retreat with the MIT/Wellesley Toons in essentially the middle of nowhere, New Hampshire. The house we stayed in was in a very pretty location and was pretty nice, but it lacked certain things to which I have grown accustomed. It lt lacked, for example, centralized heating, relying instead on two wood stoves. It also lacked plentiful power outlets and (gods forbid!) Internet Connectivity of any sort. Thus, while I brought my laptop, I did not, in fact, power it on. For the most part, retreat is pretty blocked-out schedule wise, but it does block out more time for sleeping than what we MIT (and apparently Wellesley) students are accustomed. Thus, rather than go to sleep as soon as we could, we followed our natural impulses to waste time in whatever convenient way was available. For a lot of the the Toons this involved having a dance party in the kitchen powered by the aux-input on Buck, the Singing Deer, and while I did do this some, I soon sought alternative entertainment. Having no Internet, I switched instead to the time-honored tradition of writing, with ink, on paper while sitting by one of the wood stoves. I basically followed the “free-writing” paradigm, meaning that I did not so much have an idea of what I was going to write about as just kind of do a stream of consciousness flow. I present below the results of this exercise. By the nature of the method, I make no guarantee about the coherence, pointedness, or even correctness of what I say. In any case, I hope it gives an interesting insight into my state of mind and thoughts of late. Enjoy:

It’s an interesting thing, in the modern era, to be cut off from even some of the trappings of modern life– trappings: a simple word that alone denotes the accessory, the non-essential, what you think you’d like to have, and yet hidden in it is that notion, that so of our generation associates with the squidly head of Admiral Achbar that “it’s a trap.” Is it? In these non-essentials do we lose sight of the things that truly are important? Caught up in the escapism of the modern, digital, mass culture do we seek, and do we find a way to forget about harsh realities? Things like like love, like family, like accomplishment and caring. Making something of ourselves and finding worth. IT is oft’ quoted by American Historians that the notion of ‘mass culture’, of expression through leisure arose in the 1920s — that as work became industrialized, regimented, and unskilled, as people stopped being fulfilled in their work that they stopped finding fulfillment in producing and they started consuming — consumer culture was born. And thus it has been borne, borne by society ever since. Finding value in what you know, what you saw, chatting about the recent movie, the recent reality show — the “regular” lives put on display that people attend to rather than their own. It is natural in such a world to lose a sense of personal importance, to be reduced to a “nobody” rather than a “somebody.” And that’s the norm. Not everyone can be important, but in delocalization the proportion of the pertinent rises and the practical percentage that can be seen as “special” drops. You can’t be as unique when there is more to compare to. And the standards change.

Microcosmily, there is a similar experience in a student going to college, in moving from a place where the people are localized, perhaps all their lives, to a place that draws from the entire state, nation, or the entire world. Surrounded by other, by new others, the individual has to rediscover themselves in a sense of their identity in this new context. Such has been my experience in coming to MIT, a university of global distinction for bright minds, bright ideas, and presumptive bright futures. The standards change. Moving from a realm of high school where I was exceptional to here where I am at best average and probably not quite there. Meanwhile, there are a lot of new notions of leisure and a lot more trappings — freedoms to make mistakes, or make discoveries, often both. Trappings like labs, servers, network bandwidth unparalleled in most of America, and other such fun toys. Important toys, but “toys” that come with an air of expectation.

And, thus, the cycle begins. New context, new trappings, and above all, new standards. Higher standards of average for intelligence or accomplishment, MUCH lower standards for such seeming non-essentials as amount of sleep, nutrition, keeping a normal sleep schedule, hygiene, healthy living, and standards of conventional morality. but that’s what it’s supposedly about innovation, discovery, charting new waters and fighting the good fight. Yet, at the same time, its one of the greatest feats of abstract consumerism. You are expected to absorb history and facts, methods and traditions, realities as conflicted as con reasonably coexist. Along the way, people consume substances they wouldn’t have before, experiences they couldn’t even conceive of, and somehow, in this torrent of reality, they are expected to emerge not only coherent, but better then they went in, ready to change the world for the better. but its hard to see a way out. Drenched in the fire-hose you are trying to drink, the spray stings your eyes, and if it brings tears they are mixed in the water and washed away before anyone can see they were there, but the pain isn’t [washed away]. It’s only when you step out, drenched and deflated, sodden and sullen that you recall reality. And you are supposed to reach out your brass-ratted hand, grab a cup, and squeeze the waters of knowledge from the clothes of your experience and from that, distill some new drought to take the world by storm, but before you get there there exists the ever-present risk of being swept away in the flow. There exists the possibility that you had the necessary, but not sufficient prowess and ability to arrive and succeed.

At this point I got distracted by something or other, or simply noticed that my arm was quite tired, and gave up, did something else for ~an hour, then went to sleep.

This week is likely to be very discouraging.

Oh well.

Good luck everyone,
~Donald

If you actually care about this issue (unlikely if you read this blog), there is substantially more discussion by me and people on the other side of the issue here: http://www.rhymetorrents.org/Home/viewtopic.php?f=20&t=6314

The time that I reasonably should have spent writing a blog entry was used instead catching up on things in a rather obscure area of my interest, specifically, in the ongoing controversy about self-proclaimed “Post-Punk Laptop Rapper” MC Lars and comments he has made about the subgenre known as “Nerdcore” hip hop. Since I spent a lot (really too much) time weighing in on the mclars.com forums about my opinion on the issue, I am going to here just attempt to give context and then quote my response on those forums.

For the context:
I imagine many of you have heard of neither MC Lars, nor nerdcore. I am a huge fan of the former and sometimes a fan of the latter. The short version is that MC Lars is a Stanford grad in English with a deep love of hip hop who decided to be a professional rapper for awhile. He is an altogether cool guy and I highly recommend his three most recent solo albums (the Laptop EP, the Graduate, and This Gigantic Robot Kills) and collaborative LPs ( “The Digital Gangster LP” with YTCracker and “Single & Famous” with K. Flay). Nerdcore hip hop is a subgenre of hip-hop coined by MC Frontalot and generally focused on nerd and geek culture. It’s definition is unclear and debated. It’s major practitioners are MC Frontalot, YTCracker, and a lot of small time rappers who hang around internet forums like Rhymetorrents.org. Because he is a friend and collaborator of many nerdcore artists and has made appearances at events like Nerdapalooza, MC Lars is often folded into nerdcore. This isn’t really wrong, per se, but MC Lars has never considered himself nerdcore and doesn’t like having the label applied to himself.

The major controversy began in a blog post last July where MC Lars declared that “Nerdcore is Dead“. While this title was largely in deference to Nas’s 2006 album “Hip Hop is Dead”, this went way over the head of most of the nerdcore community (myself included truthfully) and he caught major flack for both the fanciful assertion and the actual content of the entry. There was a lot of flaming on both sides (nothing compared to the old school hip hop feuds, no one got shot), but eventually MC Lars apologized for the misunderstanding and things quieted down.

That was until the San Jose Metro published an article about Lars’s 10th anniversary show that contained the rather inflammatory remark by Lars that

“Nerdcore shouldn’t be kids’ understanding of hip-hop. It’s cool as an anthropological extension of how hip-hop has evolved,” says Lars. “The whole political component of the African American experience in the Bronx in the ’70s, and the financial disparity under Reagan in the ’80s, is kind of what hip-hop trades on as its old-school genesis. I think nerdcore’s really racist, because it takes that underdog thing of an underclass judged by their race, and uses it as this big, ridiculous metaphor to be like ‘the nerds are being persecuted.’ That turns hip-hop into this weird minstrel show to me.”

This put the community back up in arms. MC Lars stayed largely quiet about the issue, addressing it mostly in a UStream webcam session of RealTalk with MC Lars on February 13th. A couple weeks later, last Wednesday, he released a track with Random named “Nerdcore Died” announced here. It’s worth a listen: MP3.

In general this is the context I was catching up on and what I was commenting on, drawing from in my long forum post of this evening that I will reproduce below. In particular I am responding to a comment by mCRT phrased as both an open letter on his site, some comment on RhymeTorrenst, a commenton the MC Lars forum, and a diss track. I am directly responding to the latter two. I responded thusly

The post:
—-
For some reason I wish to reply to mCRT (and by extension some of the other critics), despite the fact that I really have better things to do.

The point on what is an appropriate way to start a dialogue is a valid one, but if you look at the RealTalk session from the 13th it’s pretty clear that launching a media attack is not what the racism comment was about. As for the original “Nerdcore is Dead” comment, it was a blog entry and was very clearly not meant as a personal attack on anyone. It also I think falls closer to the definition of an appropriate way to start a dialogue. It was an open letter more than anything elese. It was, and Lars’s comments have consistently been, about not limiting yourself to a stereotype of a genre.

That’s what Lars’s verses on this song are about too. The first is about the blog post and the following discussion. The main point is really found in this quote from the blog entry:

Look at these artists and then look at some of the lesser known peeps in the scene and you’ll see why some transcend and some are doomed to obscurity. My point is this: if you want to make music, make amazing music and don’t try to be in a scene. Don’t limit yourself. [...] Kids who are ONLY listening to MC Frontalot and mc chris sound like lo-fi versions the Lonely Island guys…. and if that’s what you’re going for, more power to you… but true music fans would rather listen to artists who make great albums and move us emotionally than listen to a novelty act looking for their fifteen minutes in a genre that has come and gone.

As for “picking a fight”, as for “how complaining about bullying is somehow racist”… it’s possible that I am missing a reference to a specific quote, but if not, then you are grossly conflating reflections on a class struggle with reflections on a personal struggle.. Modern discussions of race are full of controversy and often miss the point. The African-American population was systematically oppressed for a long time, as were the Chinese, as were the Irish (for a shorter) time, as are many immigrants and people of various sorts still today.

These people were and are born into a culture that is built to prevent them from succeeding and are faced with a titan unfairness. The modern trope of the nerd is strictly one of personality, indeed one usually built out of privilege. Does it lead to personal struggle? absolutely. Is that fact lamentable? absolutely. I, personally, went through bullying in elementary school, but I still ended up at MIT and have access to bright future so long as I don’t personally do anything to screw it up. This is the exact opposite of the situation of an oppressed class whose members only can hope to succeed through substantial personal fighting of these opinions and, realistically, the luck of finding progressively-minded people in power along the way. People getting picked on for not being into the same things is regrettable, but at the core it is not the same as a pervasive prejudice. While I agree that to some extent Lars has had some less than ideal phrasing at times, I think this is fundamentally what he is saying.
From the 13th video:

Nerdcore though, in my opinion, can, doesn’t always, but sometimes has this tendency to take on this mantle of the oppressed African American, you know, the oppressed group of people who were the same people who in the bronx started DJing and having parties cause their whole neighborhood was destroyed by the Bronx Expressway that was built in the middle of their neighborhood [...] Nerdcore takes on the asthetic of the opressed person and uses it to express the politics of “how hard it is to be a nerd.” [...] What I meant to say maybe was nerdcore is classist, not racist… someone from the suburbs writing a rap song about how they are gangsta because they steal quarters out of the vending machine and they are so gangsta because they beat super mario in ten minutes for me that’s kinda weird.

or more succinctly (at 12:33, excerpted for clarity) :

Only listening to one genre of music that is closely identified with a certain culture is classist in the sense that you don’t understand, you don’t listen to the whole political history [...] and it’s racist [...] when people use this [originally] African-American aesthetic to express something that makes a mockery of it.

Now for your rap:
I learned how to deal with bullies … SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK I JUST SAID THAT WAS RACIST?!
I think I adressed this above. In short: nothing. It’s only classist if you think this entitles you to feel on-level with some sort of civil rights movement. I don’t think you do, so this has largely devolved into a squabble over nothing

MC Lars you’re full of empty bars … I resent the bars you’re launching at my friends … It’s not dialogue unless you do it to our face… I HOPE YOU NEVER SELL ANOTHER RECORD NOT FUCKING EVER
That seems unreasonably vindictive. I appreciate that its in the context of a form (the diss-track) that is designed to be unreasonable. But, what I really take issue with is the notion that “Nerdcore Died” is a diss track. It’s really mostly just a restatement of the blog entry that started this whole thing. It’s a call to not be limited. The only negative vibe to it is basically saying “try harder”, not “you suck.” there is a big difference. To shell out to the article that started this whole recent racism debacle:

Instead of the typical hip-hop (and nerdcore) assertion that “I’m the best,” Lars’ attitude is “we could all be better,” and he is constantly pushing his listeners, his generation, to embrace that possibility for evolution.”

… We’ll go into this more after the next verse

Do you remember last year … when you encouraged me… I WANT THAT LARS BACK. I want the Lars that was supportive, that had love for the green, I want the Lars that wasn’t bitter and could run with the scene, I want the Lars that gave a hand instead of a slap, I want the Lars that wasn’t shoving knives in our backs … FUCK YOU LARS, WE REALLY DON’T NEED YOU
Dude. What universe are you living in? Lars has made a consistent effort to be a help to individuals. He has not, that I’ve seen, put anyone down, only challenge them to be better. The existence of http://mclars.com/books.html and http://mclars.com/gear.html are persistent examples of this. He is trying to make people better. In fact, both MC Lars and Random have more encouraging words than not in Nerdcore Died. Consider these verses, excerpted, emphasis added:

Random:
I know a lot of rappers or people who claim
To be deep in the game, but are secretly lame
And when I hear their records, I start laughing it up
and I want to tell them “Please stop rapping. You suck”
But I don’t, cause who am I to crush the dream
cause I love hip hop, I got love for the scene
[... here he complains about low production values, I personally am not sure how I feel on this issue]
I make good music that folks want to listen to,
But don’t get it mixed up, Random ain’t dissin’ you
[It's] not that I’m too big to hang out or get with you.
[...] Think of who you listen to,
imitate than innovate. Become original, than I’ll get with you

MC Lars:
I’ve got love for the kids with their laptops,
Up in the lab, making crunkcore rap-rock
Writing rhymes with the straight flow, nonstop
[...] putting styles in a headlock
[...]
Look all I want to see is amazing art.
Invest your heart! Play your part!
Prefect your craft and straight do you
If you don’t do you than whose going to?
Just push it, push it, make it awesome
[...]

Random:
[...]
Success is a journey, not a destination
I’ve never been down with this type-cast nonesense

Consistently it’s about continuing to push the art and rejecting your limits. I distinctly feel like by falling into the trap of the dis-track and cursing heavy asthetic, you have caught the “imitate”, but you are missing the “innovate”. And you’re missing the point. MC Lars doesn’t seem to hate you or anyone in the genre. He just is asking for you to keep pushing yourself.

As for your “spoken word” section. It’s a straw man argument. MC Lars is not the one in the above track dissing low production values. He encourages the DIY mentality, but he wants results. He has made some comments on the subject that come across a little hypocritical, but the central point is still there. Don’t be satisfied with a shitty sound. Sure, it’s a step on the journey, but keep going. Approach it with some humility and don’t overestimate yourself. Don’t send him a demo that’s a waste of his time.

I think I adressed the racism thing. While I don’t like country music, you are hurting your credibility on the “fucking your sister” bit… but to go on to my next point … there is nothing wrong with parody. But that’s just it really, the problem is in taking yourself too seriously. MC Lars’s entire point in this is “don’t convince yourself you are hardcore when you are not.” Parody’s are light-hearted by definition. That’s not what I perceive Lars to be taking issue with.

Let’s look at your rap here as art. It has pretty good production values. It has a vocal tone very reminiscent of Eminem in some places and of MC Frontalot in others. But it is cast in the light of a dis track that makes it hard to appreciate as … well, art. If you are really so antagonistic that you want to see MC Lars doomed to failure over this, than it seems like you have some issues on understanding what’s up. If it was parody (like Monzy’s “Drama in the PhD”), I would appreciate it more. But it isn’t. and yet it doesn’t come off quite as from the heart. The effect is ultimately inauthentic and that undercuts the artistic value, for me at least. But you got talent there. Like MC Lars apparently already told you, keep trying, but don’t limit yourself.

There’s more to say, but that’s all I have time for. And probably more than anyone actually cares to read.

tl;dr MC Lars has good morals. Some nerdcore is classist because it lacks historical consciousness. Don’t limit yourself. Be authentic.

Back to real life,
~Donald Guy
—–

So that is what I spent most of my evening on. If there are any of you in the readership of this blog who find that remotely interesting. I am glad. I do.

I think that this discussion is important to the future direction of underground hip-hop, and it brings up a lot of important societal issues in general.

Now actually back to real life,
~Donald